Parent tip
Set out crayons and paper before inviting your toddler in so the first minute feels smooth.
Back-to-Back Scribble
Sit back-to-back and draw separately — physical touch maintained, focus independent.
Activity details
Instructions
- Set out two pieces of paper and crayons on the floor.
- Sit down and pat the space behind you: 'Sit here — we are going to draw back-to-back!'
- Settle so your backs are touching firmly.
- Each choose a crayon: 'I am going to draw a house. What will you draw?'
- Draw in comfortable silence for a few minutes, letting the back-contact do the connecting.
- Chat as you draw: 'I am using blue now. What colour are you using?'
- After five minutes, count down: 'Three, two, one — turn around!'
- Show each other your drawings with genuine interest: 'Tell me about yours!'
What success looks like
Messy hands and a child who doesn’t want to stop. The artwork doesn’t need to look like anything — the process is the point.
Sit on the floor back-to-back with your child, each with your own paper and crayons. Draw at the same time. The physical contact through the back satisfies the touch need, but the orientation means your child is looking at their own work, not at you. When you both turn around to show your drawings, the reveal is the reward. This gentle arrangement teaches that being connected and being independent can happen at the same time — the most important lesson a clingy toddler needs to learn.
Why it helps
Zero to Three emphasises that 'when caregivers are consistently attuned and engaged,' children learn they can explore safely. The back-to-back position delivers continuous physical contact — which is what the clingy child is asking for — while naturally orienting the child's attention toward their own work rather than toward you. The NHS describes clingy toddler behaviour as a phase where they 'whimper, whine or cling to you' and recommends reassurance over scolding. The back-to-back arrangement maintains reassuring contact through touch while introducing the experience of separate, independent activity.
Variations
- Use play dough instead of crayons — the sensory input through the hands adds another calming dimension.
- Set a theme: 'Let's both draw an animal' and see how different they turn out.
- For younger toddlers, sit side-to-side instead of back-to-back — the concept is the same but the position is easier.
Safety tips
- Use chunky, non-toxic crayons that are too large to be swallowed.
- Ensure the floor surface is comfortable — use a rug or mat if needed.
- If your child becomes upset about not seeing your face, switch to side-by-side drawing instead.
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